Bitches Always Fake It

This video was a bit of a letdown.

This dog played dead. That's it. She didn't go sailing and have her boat never return. There was no million dollar insurance policy and a false passport. You don't see video of that dog putting a similar dog's corpse in her house and torching the whole thing.

Talk about misleading. Fake its own death?
AOL needs to get their shit together.

The Game Show Will Not Be Televised

I auditioned for a revival of The Dating Game. I think I lost right after question 5.

Sunday Cipher #19 - Spice Cake and Intrigue

Bernd and Sangwan slipped you the key to the baker's shop yesterday inside a commemorative deck of nudie playing cards. You made it to the baker's with no trouble. Now that you're inside, you see the baker slumped over the decorating table, the tip of a pastry bag jammed into his jugular! Wait, that baker is Henri, and that's not strawberry filling! There is a spice cake still on the table in front of Henri and the lettering on top is just barely legible. Can you decipher Henri's last message before Klaus marries the referee!?

Below is a quote from a famous person encoded with a substitution cipher. Each letter has been swapped for another. Today's hint: U equals D.

"ZVYZRYS?/ XVR/ CLKZ/ ZV/ ZLNT/ LDVRZ/ ZVYZRYS/ XVR/ EOVRNU/ ZYX/ AX/ CQHS'E/ ASLZNVLH/ EVASZQAS."/
- UVKLNU/ YRAEHSNU

The first person to e-mail me the correct answer at imillermoth@gmail.com wins a prize! If you would like your prize sent to you, include a mailing address with your answer.

Last week's answer:
"New Year's Day is the first chance that you have each year to lie to yourself about all the things you are going to change; you may as well lie big."
- Deepak Chopra